Thursday, May 1, 2008

"May Day! May Day!"

A lot of people keep little books of inspirational quotes from religious leaders or famous people. I don't. But I do gather various quotes and one-liners from my own life that make me laugh, or which I wish to remember, and write them on the inside covers of my doodle book. Here are the ones I love the best:

Band director at BYU: "Just be accurate, horns."

Oboe instructor at BYU: "Still on the horn? You can get over that, you know."

Creative writing teacher at BYU to another student: "Does this story go forward? I mean, eventually?"

Student at BYU: "Beethoven may not have been a clogger, but he was a violist."

King Tuffett: "This is a fun game now."
Queen Tuffett: "Why, because we're winning?"
King Tuffett: "Because now there's violence in the game."

Jennie: "Oh my gosh, you actually learned from a book?"

Betty: "How do you make an elephant float? With one scoop of ice cream and one scoop of elephant."
Nephew D: "And root beer!"
Betty: "Well, of course, root beer."
Nephew D: "Otherwise it's just an elephant sundae."

Random date: "Turn left at the stop sign. It's where all those cars are stopped."

Ward choir director: "People! Are we crashing a train or singing a song?"

Betty: "The moon is my favorite celestial body."
Sam: "Trevor was mine."

Betty in a dream: "It is far worse to lose your hearing than your earlobes."

Nephew T: "I look like a taco. Wanna eat me?"

Mother Edit: "Wait, I'm garbage disposaling."
Betty: "Using the garbage disposal?"
Father Edit: "What, you don't like the verbing of nouns?"

And quotes regarding myself:

S.H. : "You are a strange, strange person."

A: "Get over it. You're special."

Ops. Manager at store 292: "You're a freak."

Ops. Manager at store 8: "You're a freak."

Olive: "You're interesting. Just so you know."

Nephew T: "You're a hit for an aunt!"

Mother Edit: "But you don't have anything wrong with you but your brain!"


elegyrl said...

You're a freak!

Just Kidding! I love ya! I love reading your blog it always makes me smile! But not as much as when we hang out and not send faxes or not buy gas and stuff like that! :) Thanks for my p-nut butter cup tonight~ It was double the p-nut butter goodness!

ol' Bob said...

"You'll appreciate your intelligence in the eternities." -MMM

So who is MMM, and is this a forehead-slapper question, and why haven't I noticed that statement before?

And you p-nut-butter-cupped elegyrl.

Betty Edit said...

MMM is my friend on a mission in the Midwest. I put up the quote a week or so ago.

You can never have too much peanut butter goodness. Never.

Olive Kite said...

Betty: (that's once)

Olive Kite said...

Betty: "I didn't believe you."

Olive Kite said...

Betty: I'm pasting something together. (Well, this one might not be a direct quotation.)

Betty Edit said...

When did I say "I didn't believe you"? It sounds like something I would say.

Direct quote: "I'm gluing something."

Olive Kite said...

Betty: "I'm just here, floating around in my swimming pool, talking on the phone, and recording notes for my latest book, and drying my freshly painted toenails."

(I guess you're adept at not dipping your wet nails into the water?)

Betty Edit said...

Olive, I have never said, nor will I ever say, anything that involves me and the pool and the phone and my writing and my toenails simultaneously. In fact, I think you'd be hard pressed to hear me mention even two of them at once.